Re: can't have sex
From: Sue (anonymous@obgyn.net)
Sat, 6 Jul 2002 11:07:45 -0500 (CDT)
I appreciate and understand your response. But, I guess my question is
that if it is not psychological, is it possible for him to be too big or
me too small. Can he physically hurt me? Could I tear or anything? Have
any women out there ever had this problem and have any advice? Thanks!
>Sue, I would suggest you seek help from a psycotherapist to help you get
>over your past. Also remember, having sex if you are scared of getting
>hurt can be rather traumatic.
>
>>Hi Everyone,
>>
>>I'm really hoping someone can help me because I'm so confused. I tried
>>having sex with my boyfriend tonight, and it didn't really work. He's
>>really big around, and I feel like I'm going to tear something. It
>>REALLY hurts, and I made him stop. We tried a few times, but he
>>couldn't get inside. He says it even hurt for him because I'm so tight.
>>I am basically a virgin, so I know that first times are tough, but I
>>didn't expect this. I've been using tampons for years and don't think I
>>still have a hymen (how do I know?). I've been going to the gyno since
>>I was 18 and no problems there during examinations or anything. Never
>>had a problem before at all with any sort of sexual act. I don't know
>>if it's me or his size and what to do about it.
>>
>>A point of note, I was molested as a child. We've talked about this and
>>what it means in terms of my trust and sex and all. I can do everything
>>else without pain or problem. I really don't think it's psychological
>>esp since penetration wasn't an issue in my childhood (that I remember).
>>
>>I also really don't like sex all that much. Is that normal? I just
>>don't find it enjoyable. And, I kinda am concerned that it's going to
>>be an issue in the future.
>>
>>HELP!
>>
>>Any advice is welcomed!!!!
>>
>>THANKS!
>
>--
>John Essien, M.D. SOCOG
>Camaguey, Cuba; Basseterre, St. Kitts
>http://www.obgyn.net/all_advisors/J_Essien.htm
>
>**Private emails cannot be entertained due to time constraints,
>consequently no private emails will receive a response.
>