YOUNG-WOMEN Messages for August, 2000: Re: problems getting pregnant

Re: problems getting pregnant

From: D. Ashley Hill, MD (anonymous@obgyn.net)
Sat, 19 Aug 2000 20:59:02 -0500 (CDT)

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In reply to: Claudia Twisdale RN: "Re: problems getting pregnant"

At Sat, 19 Aug 2000, Claudia Twisdale RN wrote:

>Suzanne, I wish I could tell you that being pregnant and having children
>is easy, but I can't. Parenthood is a hard job. snip At 17 the world is at your
>feet, you can be anything, do anything, and go anywhere you want. Enjoy
>your youth.

As a brand new parent I can verify Claudia's views on parenthood. It is extremely hard. Despite the fact that both my wife and I are physicians in our mid-thirties and have the economic means to hire someone to help out once in a while around the house, we still struggle with the extraordinary time requirements of being parents. Based on my experience of delivering almost 4000 babies, many to teenagers, I promise you that having a baby in your teens is a potential recipe for personal and economic despair. Most babies born to teens end up on welfare. A higher proportion than those born to women in older age groups end up in jail. I would guess that 80% of the babies I deliver to teen parents end up under the permanent care of the patient's mother (baby's grandmother) or some other relative. It's just too much work for the average teenager to raise a baby. This places an unfair burden on your parents. After all, they did not choose to have another baby.

I have also noticed that the boyfriend is the real or perceived reason behind the desire to become pregnant in many cases. Maybe he is thinking of seeing someone else, or maybe he has a baby with another girl. Regardless, neither are good reasons to have a baby. I recently cared for a teenager who was dating a soon to be famous college athlete. She was =really= trying to get pregnant, and had to get pregnant before he signed his contract. You can do the math yourself, but this seems like a very selfish reason to bring a baby into the world. Only you can truthfully gauge why you want to have a baby at only age 17.

Even if you really want a baby, regardless of your boyfriend or your family, please consider that babies need 24-hour a day attention. That means pretty much giving up the mall, movies, hanging out with friends, and playing sports. It also likely means giving up going to college or potentially entering the career you were hoping for. Good luck with your decision.

--
David Ashley Hill, MD
Associate Director
Department of Obstetrics and Gynecology
Florida Hospital Family Practice Residency
http://home.cfl.rr.com/dahmd

My apologies, but due to time constraints I am unable to answer private e-mails.

Next message: Harvey S. Marchbein, M.D.: "Re: Abnormal Pap & microplasmic test relating to bacterial vaginitis"
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In reply to: Claudia Twisdale RN: "Re: problems getting pregnant"

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