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Re: still a virgin...help
From: ash (anonymous@obgyn.net)
Mon, 17 Jul 2000 15:19:09 -0500 (CDT)
Initially it was my decision to be a virgin till married..my boyfriend
now shows interest in having more to our relationship, i have decided to
go ahead but i am not able to have sex,does everyone have the same fears
the first time?..i just push my BF away the minute he tries and even
with little pain..i fear the worst pain and suffering when having
sex...secondly i don't even know how ?
please help me, my BF now is fed up of me, i don't wanna lose him, we
both love each other a lot.
At Mon, 17 Jul 2000, Jennifer wrote:
>
>first of all I think it is great that you are still a virgin. It is so
>unfortunate that our society looks down on those who decide to wait. I am
>27 years old and a virgin and am very glad I've waited this long. I am
>getting married in six months and I look forward to sex in a commited
>relationship. Though my fiance is also a virgin, I have had to set some
>boundaries as to how far I wanted to go with him. This is hard, especially
>when one wants to please the person they care for..and like you mentioned,
>the underlying fear that they might leave us. However, the fact that you
>fear your boyfriend leaving you seems like the wrong reason to want to have
>sex. Though I know it is hard, I encourage you to listen to what you want
>and not let this fear tell you what to do. Also, I would encourage you to
>share your fears that you mention to your boyfriend if you haven't
>already...sometimes it amazes me how much REALLY talking with help sort
>things out. I have also found it very helpful to have some friends that
>share the same convictions as I do. I hope this helps in some way, take
>care.
>J.M.
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