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Re: cervical cancer

From: Barbara (anonymous@obgyn.net)
Mon, 3 May 1999 20:02:20 -0500 (CDT)


Dear Penny,

I am truly sorry about your mother-in-laws condition. She has been through so much over the past few years and now she is going through it again.

As Dr. Marchbein so kindly said in his post it is time for all of you, (Mom and the family) to have a talk about just what She would like to do.

My first husband died of colon cancer with mets to his liver at age 52. He had a long year post surgery of trying different types of treatments and none worked for him. I sometimes wonder if the quality of his last months alive would have been better for him if he had not spent so many days taking chemo that only made him sick. No one can answer this question for another human bieing except themselves. But sometimes, Some people like to get permission from their loved ones that it's OK to stop treatment and just enjoy as best they can the days left to them.

Chemo is a Very debilitating form of threapy. I know this first hand as I have had both chemo and radiation for breast cancer 3 years ago, It just drains every last ounce of strengh out of you and causes bone and muscle aches that last a long time after the chemo treatments are over. For me at that time it was to hopefully kill it and keep it from returning. In my husbands case it was not. There was no cure...... It was to hopefully shrink the tumors and prolong his life. Well in his case it did not work and his last year was spent in and out of a hospital and with no energy between treatments.

If he and I had it to do over again I would hope and pray we could find a way to not continue to treat something that is untreatable and just try and find some peace and happiness in the days we had left together.

This is a Very personal decission and one that should be made by the patient with the condition and if they want input (which many people do) from their close family members or dear friends then that is the best way to go.

I would advise someone going with her to the oncologists and asking point blank, "What will the chemo do for me/her?" What should I/she expect in the way of side effects?" "will this prolong my/her life and if so for how long?" (this is a tough one for any doc to answer but most oncologists can give a pretty close guess.

Have they said it is terminal to her or a family member? If not make sure you or her find out, Because this will make a difference in her choice of treatment or not.

Also ask about pain medication and what the plan is for her care. This is the single most important thing in a terminal patients care if this is in fact the case for her.

Make Sure you get a medication plan that will work! There are many drugs on the market for cancer pain and an oncologist it the one to know all about this.

I send my hope for all of you to stay strong and stay loving to one another as this is the Most difficult time in a families life together.

Barbara

At Mon, 3 May 1999, Harvey S. Marchbein, M.D. wrote: >
>At Sun, 2 May 1999, Penny wrote:
>>
>>could anyone maybe help me understand a little more ? my mother law has
>>been diagnosed with cervical cancer that has spread onto the tail bone.
>>she has already completed 6 days of radiation, with 10 more days to go.
>>they are wanting to give her a 2 week break after the radiation
>>treatments are finished and then do chemo . for how long we dont know
>>yet. she is 57 and weighs 94lbs. she is very emaciated and just looks
>>totaly like a walking skeleton. her primary doctor has said it is stage
>>4 and the radiation is only for the pain the chemo is for helping it not
>>spread anywhere else. she is trying to make an informed decision as to
>>go on with the chemo or not . would anyone like to guess if it would be
>>worth the suffering of chemo or if it would really help. this is the 3
>>bout of cancer in 5 yrs for her she has a colon bag in place from where
>>radiation destroyed the organs last time. and they did a lung removal
>>around 4 yrs ago for cancer ty penny
>
>This is, unfortunately, a case of palliation (making more comfortable)
>with no realistic chance for cure. In that regard, the patient needs to
>have a frank, honest discussion with the medical oncologist as to the
>side effects of the medications to be used and the amount of time that
>she has left and what to expect for that time with and without chemo.
>This is a difficult time for a patient and the family but this is when
>the entire family must work together and support the patient.
>
>--
>Harvey S. Marchbein, M.D. FACOG, FACS
>Great Neck, New York
>http://www.obgyn.net/states/bios/marchbein.htm
>http://www.obgyn.net/women/advisors/harveym.htm
>
>**Note: Opinions expressed here are for educational purposes only
>and, as such, do not constitute a physician-patient relationship.
>This information is not intended to supplant the need for you to
>consult with your physician prior to choosing therapeutic options
>and/or interventions.
>
>**Private emails cannot be entertained due to time constraints,
>consequently no private emails will receive a response.
>
>**Thank you for your understanding ;-)
>

--
Barbara Nesbitt
Editor, OBGYN.net



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