WOMENS-HEALTH Messages for March, 1998: Re: Past abortions and pregnancy.........

Re: Past abortions and pregnancy.........

From: Adrienne (anonymous@obgyn.net)
Wed, 18 Mar 1998 22:13:05 -0600 (CST)

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In reply to: anonymous@obgyn.net: "Re: Past abortions and pregnancy........."

At Wed, 18 Mar 1998, anonymous@obgyn.net wrote: >
>At Tue, 17 Mar 1998, Anonymous wrote:
>>
>>I'm so embarassed and ashamed to be telling anyone this.....I've had 3
>>abortions while in high school. I'm now 23 years old and have been
>I can't answer any of the doctor questions, but I can tell you if the
>abortions are really bothering you, there are post abortion support
>groups out there and they can be very helpful in helping you deal with
>any emotions you may be experiencing. The other ladies are right-your
>past is the past.>married for 2 years. My husband and I recently found
>out I was
>>pregnant, and were so excited but then I miscarried when I was only 5
>>weeks along. We are ready to try again as soon as my first period
>>comes, but now I'm worried that my past abortions will prevent me from
>>ever having a baby. I'm so ashamed of having my abortions, I haven't
>>even told my doctor. The reason I'm worried is because with each
>>abortion, they opened my cervix with a metal device which caused sever
>>cramping.......have I ruined my chances of having children with my
>>husband because of my horrible mistakes of the past?? I'm so ashamed and
>>embarassed.........

Dear Anonymous, I too have had three abortions. I also have three healthy children. My first two children were born after the first abortion (when I was 19 and 22) and the third child was born after 2 additional abortions and the 2 children. Unforntunalty today I deal with cervical cancer, due to such an early active sex life.(so ALWAYS get your PAP smears, women who were active early and had multiple partners are more inclined to get dyplasia and cervical cancer..a PAP will detect it early enough to make it nothing to worry about) That aside, I understand your shame, but try to remember that you made the choices you made based on your life at the time. However you feel about these choices, believe me, talking to a conselor or therapist will help you deal with the shame so you can let go and move forward. You don't have to live in shame. Talk to someone who can help you heal. Perhaps you'll soon be able to see that these were not "horible mistakes", but hard decisions you made at a difficult time in your life. Be gentle with yourself.

--
A.

Next message: Yvette: "Hysterectomy concerns"
Previous message: Ari: "Re: GBS and Premature Rupture of Membranes(are they related)"
In reply to: anonymous@obgyn.net: "Re: Past abortions and pregnancy........."

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