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TGIF: Stupid Men Jokes From: AnnMarie (anonymous@obgyn.net) Thu, 25 Sep 1997 14:38:10 +0000 Messages sorted by: [ date ][ thread ][ subject ][ author ] Next message: Laura: "OB/GYN residency" Previous message: AnnMarie: "TGIF: Bedroom Golf ; )" Stupid Men Jokes What do you call a man with half a brain? Gifted. What's the difference between government bonds and men? Bonds Mature. What did God say after creating man? I can do better. Husband: Want a quickie? Wife: As opposed to what? Why do men want to marry virgins? They can't stand criticism. What do you have when you have two little balls in your hand? A man's undivided attention. What are two reasons why men don't mind their own business? 1. No mind. 2. No business. How is a man like a snowstorm? Because you don't know when he's coming, how many inches you'll get, or how long it'll stay. Did you hear about the banker who's a great lover? He knows first-hand the penalty for early withdrawal. What do you call an intelligent man in America? A tourist. Why do men name their penises? Because they want to be on a first-name basis with the person who makes all their decisions. Why do men like masturbation? Its sex with someone they love. What is gross stupidity? 144 men in one room. Husband: I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it. Wife: You wear briefs, don't you? What's the difference between a porcupine and a Corvette? The porcupine has pricks on the outside. How many men does it take to pop popcorn? Three. One to hold the pan and two others to show off and shake the stove. What is a man's view of safe sex? A padded headboard. How do men sort their laundry? "Filthy" and "Filthy but Wearable". Only a man would buy a $500 car and put a $4000 stereo in it. Why did God create man? Because a vibrator can't mow the lawn. Why were men given larger brains than dogs? So they wouldn't hump women's legs at cocktail parties. Two guys were strolling down the street when one guy exclaimed, "how sad -a dead bird." The other man looked up and said, "where?" Why does the stupid man put ice in his condom? To keep the swelling down. Next message: Laura: "OB/GYN residency" Previous message: AnnMarie: "TGIF: Bedroom Golf ; )"

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