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Can't stop worrying....From: Jennifer (anonymous@obgyn.net)Sun, 2 Feb 2003 22:50:17 -0600 (CST)
I cannot escape the overwheling thoughts of a missed abortion or miscarriage. I had an ectopic pregnany at 8 weeks that was misdiagnosed and resulted in rupture and landed me in the hospital last July. Now with my new doc, I had surgery Dec. 5 for a diagnostic lap to see if there were any remaining problems. Doc flushed my tubes (HCG on Dec. 2 read 0) and sent me home with positive remarks. Two weeks later learned I was pregnant. Called doc and he sent me for HCG right away. Levels were 1100 - two days later 2349. Had ultrasound Dec. 26 showed one week behind where I thought but h/b was 103 (tech said was a little low) -- made me nervous -- had repeat u/s on Jan. 6 and heartrate measured (according the NP's watch) 150+. Although I keep hearing pos remarks -- everytime I tell someone I am pregnant (12 weeks Wed. w/ doc appt. Thurs.) they share stories of miscarriages and missed abortions. Just when I start to feel relieved I hear a bad story and it sends horrible thoughts through my mind. I even did one of those stupid wives tales with the string--a couple weeks ago it was swinging like a fool -- today nothing. What does that mean -- besides I should not follow wives tales?? I know many women have this overwhelming feeling throughout their pregnancy but how do I focus on the good and weed out the bad that may / may not happen. I cannot face the pain of failing again. My three best friends had their healthy babies within the last month and I just want to be happy and not be so self consumed by negative thoughts. Sorry if this message seems self-absorbed --I needed a place to ask for advice.
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