Re: TTC and then NOT TTC and still feeling bad
From: Mel (anonymous@obgyn.net)
Tue, 29 Apr 2003 03:32:14 -0500 (CDT)
Oh Sonnet Honey
You are so not horrid. I can totally empathise with you. You know Bri
and I have spent the last 4 years being delighted for everyone around us
either adopting or being pgy, and wee have reached the stage when we are
all happied for everyone else out. I have heard so many people bitch
becasue thay did not fall pgy first try, or because they are sick during
pgy, anf i think 'for christ's sack i know we, and other couple we be
delighted to throw up every day if it meant we could have a heathly full
term pgy'
You are one of the most selfless people i have had the previlage of
'meeting', you are kind and have the heart of a lion, so don't you even
think of feeling guilty for your emotions, and i applaud you for haveing
the courage to acknoledge the way you feel. Far too many of us try to
ignore it and end up surpressing it, it then turns to rage and we end up
taking it out on our loved ones or each other, Sonnet you are a great
person, DON'T FEEL BAD LADY!!
Huge ((((((hugs))))), take great care
Loves to the three of you
Mel
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
At Mon, 28 Apr 2003, Sonnet wrote:
>
>OK I'm feeling like the worst person in the world today :(
>
>As you all know (like many of you guys) we TTC for 3 years. Now we're
>finally pg, and couldn't be happier about it! But along the way there
>were miscarriages and total annovulation and a failed adoption and all
>kinds of horrid things. You guys understand all of that I know. And
>you understand how awful it is, when you're TTC, to hear about people
>who are pregnant, especially if it was a mistake, or took them exactly
>one cycle off birth control, or if they already neglect or abuse the
>kids they have. Or whatever!
>
>Well now I AM pg, and you know what? I'm still horrible about it. I
>still don't want to feel excited for other people I know (those without
>PCOS or other infertility issues, mind you) who are pregnant. I don't
>want to be thrilled to tears about how they're having ANOTHER kid. I
>don't want to compare pregnancies. I want to say, This one is so much
>more special to me than yours will ever be to you! I don't want to
>listen to them go on and on about how they hate being pregnant, are so
>hideously uncomfortable, or how they are dreading the arrival of another
>child. I feel REALLY angry when I hear tha and sick to my stomach and I
>cry all the time when people go on like this. I thought all those
>feelings would go away once I was no longer TTC! What's wrong with me???
>
>My boss (who fits many of the above criteria) had an ultrasound today
>and was showing off pictures, and I just didn't want to even look at
>them. Aren't I horrible? I'm happy for her, sure, but I just felt
>exactly like I always did before - like I hated being slapped in the
>face with someone else's amazing fertility. Does this ever go away???
>Will I ever be able to be civil to pregnant women again and mean it? Am
>I horrible?
>
>Sonn
>
>--
>email always welcome: sonnet_fitz@hotmail.com
>
![[ PCOS Discussion Forums ]](../../images/pcos_at_obgyn.gif)