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Re: My daughter, 21 just diagnosed
From: jodi (anonymous@obgyn.net)
Wed, 4 Dec 2002 12:53:32 -0600 (CST)
And I find your need to read my posts which clearly offend you to be
completely baffling. If what I have to say bothers you, don't read it.
I am not hiding my name, it is very easy to tell which posts are from
me. I do usually hide my email address, because I am sick of all the
spam that comes into my mailbox from having my address on the web.
I do not see how you think I am telling her daughter what she should do,
when her daughter herself made the decision, before this, to wait 5
years. This medical dilemma is not a definitive reason to rush to have
children. But I did not say it was absolutely not a reason to do so.
I am not generally in the habit of starting battles here, and I did not
foresee a battle ensuing from my reply to Penny. But I have personally
witnessed far too many kids who were concieved hastily because it seemed
like a good idea the time, usually by young people, sometimes married,
and later on they decided it wasn't such a good idea after all, they
really missed a lot of just being young and free and enjoying life. I
think that a lot of us who are so hell bent on conception fail to
consider these things, that a baby changes your life in ways that are
not all positive. Yes for the most part the pros outweigh the cons IF
you are ready for them. Therefore I do not think this is a decision to
be made lightly without seriously examining all of the medical facets,
reasons for and against doing this. It is entirely possible for a 21
year old woman to be mature and settled down enough to raise a child. It
is still not a decision to be entered into lightly, and it sounds as if
her daughter previously did not want to have kids quite so early. There
may be no good reason to rush to have kids due to this problem, and I
still feel she should seriously consider the idea before going against
HER OWN (not mine) original stance.
At Wed, 4 Dec 2002, Michael wrote:
>
>I'm sorry, but I still feel like your trying to tell her what to should
>be important to her and what should not.
>
>At Wed, 4 Dec 2002, jodi wrote:
>>
>>And I did not mean to imply that your daughter is immature and not
>>capable of making this decision, as some have suggested.
>>
>>I really feel that people should have children when THEY feel they are
>>ready to have them, not when society or fears of what might happen down
>>the road dictate. SO if your daughter has her reasons for wanting to
>>wait 5 years, she must have given this some thought, and current medical
>>problems shouldn't necassarily force her to change her mind.
>>
>>So it sounds like your daughter has more issues to deal with than the
>>PCOS. Your original post was asking if cancer concerns due to PCOS
>>should sway her decision to put off having children. There really
>>aren't any, if the PCOS is being treated. It is possible that she will
>>have to decide, kids now or never, but this isn't true for certain.
>>
>>But it sounds as if your daughter has cancer concerns of another nature.
>>Not that it matters, but HPV comes in like 18 different varieties...
>>only two cause genital warts, so it's not the same thing. But I did not
>>say that that is the ONLY thing that could be causing abnormal pap
>>smears. If she does have some form of cervical cancer, then hopefully
>>it is being caught early, as it is treatable when caught early. Can't
>>say much about the biopsy thinning her cervix, but I really don't know
>>how a cervical biopsy is done. I know that when a LEEP procedure is
>>done, a section of cervix is removed - the part with the most high risk
>>cells - and there is a possibility of this having an effect on a woman's
>>ability to carry a child. There are ways, however, to deal with
>>cervix-related pregnancy issues, such as a cerclage (sp) to hold the
>>cervix closed. You will have to talk to your doctor about this.
>>Treating whatever this is should probably take priority to trying to
>>concieve, but it really depends on what the problem is, and what
>>treatment will entail. Since this really isn't related to PCOS,
>>however, you might want to try posting to the women's health forum. You
>>might get some better answers there.
>>
>>At Tue, 3 Dec 2002, Penny wrote:
>>>
>>>I did not mean to start a fight here. My daughter is very mature & is
>>>in a stable relationship. Their plan was to wait another 5 yrs to have
>>>children until this came up but are now trying to figure out the best
>>>way to approach it. They very much want to have children. I am just
>>>trying to come up with the correct answer for her. Since I know very
>>>little about this syndrom I was hopeing to get some advise from people
>>>who know more. She has had 2 bad paps and if this next one is bad will
>>>have to have biopsy. At this point test have not come up with the
>>>reason why the bad paps. I can tell you she does not have genital
>>>warts. He did not want to do biopsy due to the fact it will thin her
>>>cervix out. Bad paps can be the result of your partners past
>>>relationships also. We all know that in this day & time kids are
>>>sexually active for the most part and can run into problems because of
>>>it. My daughter has had one other relationship so who knows. I really
>>>don't care. My concern is with this syndrom and because of the bad paps
>>>has it already taken its toll on her body. If this runs into cancer
>>>eventually or if this stuff gets worse with age then my question is &
>>>was should she not consider going ahead & try to start her family. I
>>>would think that the longer this goes the harder it will be. Can anyone
>>>tell me?
>>>Again Thanks, Penny
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