PCOS Messages for January, 2002: Re: Supportive Husband again -

Re: Supportive Husband again - - Aren't you cool?!

From: tera (anonymous@obgyn.net)
Sun, 27 Jan 2002 21:13:57 -0600 (CST)

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Hi!

I just had to write to let you know how impressed I am by your post! About your wife being in denial - it's not good but I can't blame her. PCOS is a lot to try to wrap your mind around. I found out about my PCOS a snippet at a time and that was perfect for me. I was able to deal with PCOS and its affects a little at a time instead of all at once. It took a while for me to come to terms with my PCOS and to accept PCOS as my reality - infertility issue and all.

I too am married. The best gift my husband can give me is a listening ear and patience and unconditional love. I do not look like I did when my husband and I first met when I was sixteen. I'm much heavier, have body hair and have not been able to get pregnant. My hair is now beginning to thin! I need my husband's reassurance that he will love me no matter what syndrome I have, what I look like, or whether or not I can become pregnant with his child. Your wife and I have enough on our plates with the PCOS and do not want to worry about the steadfastness of our husband's love. It is also really great when I can come to my husband for the fiftieth time and tell him about how much it hurts my heart to have my hair falling out, or about how difficult it is that my pregnancy test was negative again. I don't want a solution, I just want a listening ear and some validation and understanding. I want his arm around me and to hear him say "Honey, that must be so hard. I'm here for you whenever you need me. I'll love you and will stay by your side child or no child. It doesn't matter that your hair is thinning - I hardly notice - you are sooo beautiful!" I echo everything that Kim said.

My husband and I have also had our marital problems. BIG ONES. Our marriage is far from perfect and PCOS can add additional strain in any relationship. We did get married "for better, for worse and in sickness and in health" though, right? I do not believe that you and your wife got married by accident. I believe that she is your gift and you are hers regardless of what happens between you or what comes your way in life. Keep up the good work, buddy. A lot of men could learn a few things from you! God bless you! Tera

At Sun, 27 Jan 2002, kim wrote: >
>Your a good husband.
>The thing I love most is when my husband listens to me complain, cry,
>whatever. I know he is not going anywhere - no matter what. So, I feel safe
>and completely loved, listened to, and respected. It sounds like you are the
>same way. You are far and few between!!!
>Hang in there, and keep on reading.
>Kim
>
>>From: anonymous@obgyn.net (anonymous)
>>Reply-To: anonymous@obgyn.net
>>To: Multiple recipients of list PCOS <anonymous@obgyn.net>
>>Subject: Supportive Husband again
>>Date: Sat, 26 Jan 2002 09:22:51 -0600
>>
>>I'd like to thank everyone of you for your input on this. All your
>>input has been comforting to me. Ever since she told me exactly what
>>she had I've spent countless hours reading and learning, arming myself.
>>Someone suggested a book, PCOS - The Hidden Epidimic, I ordered that
>>book 10 minutes after it was suggested and had it rushed to my office,
>>it arrived the next day.
>>One thing I must say at this point, I have admiration and respect for
>>EVERY woman out there going thru this. and those of you that responded
>>to my post, your strength and support has given me strength.
>>Yes, there are other issues between my wife and I, nothing large, just a
>>lot of little things. When we got married we were very poor. Too poor
>>in fact to afford the treatment she needed, even if she had asked for
>>it. Knowing all this now makes me sad. I have come to the conclusion
>>that my wife has been in denial of all of this, or so it seems. Now I
>>am more financially stable, I have a great job, and a great wife. and
>>even if our differances drive us apart I plan on helping her thru this
>>in any and every way I can.
>>My original post was vague someone claimed, this is true, I left out
>>alot of information, but you all have helped me, thank you. This is an
>>odd moment for me and my wife. We both come from large families and
>>both want to have a family. But after knowing this, and knowing there
>>is a chance of not having a family of our own, it makes me love my wife
>>even more, and it shows me how strong she really is, and how strong my
>>love for her is. I'll keep you all posted as to the outcome of this
>>situation. I'm sure some of you would like to know.
>>
>>Thank you,
>>Supportive Husband - Detroit Michigan
>>
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--
Tera

Next message: tera: "Re: to tera"
Previous message: Renee: "Re: Good idea about the abb's ! HELP !!"
In reply to: kim: "Re: Supportive Husband again"
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