PCOS Messages for September, 2001: Re: General feelings

Re: General feelings

From: Renee (anonymous@obgyn.net)
Sat, 29 Sep 2001 17:10:59 -0700

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I had always heard from other people that it happens when you stop looking. I never believed it until it happened to me. I have always been heavy, and grew up in a family that didn't have any money, so I was pretty low on the social totem pole in high school. While I had lots of male friends, I never had a boyfriend, and was depressed about that.

Then, I went halfway across the country for an internship after my senior year in college. I met my husband there. He was halfway across the country himself on a research internship program. His is a science/computer geek who had limited social skills. After I got past the geek factor, I saw how wonderful he was, and he saw the same in me. He doesn't like bony women. He likes the curves and softness.

We did the long distance thing for a year, then I moved to where he was. We got married 3 years after we met, and it's been 5 happy years now.

I think when you're looking, there's too much pressure on the situation, or the relationship, which strains it before it's strong enough to handle it. Also, we put on "masks" when "on the prowl." When we're not actively looking, and I certainly didn't expect to travel 1500 miles to meet my husband, we're more ourselves, and that's what attracts that special person.

Through his love and support, I have learned to be much more comfortable with myself. But, I had to be confident and comfortable enough with myself in the other areas (my mind, my skills, my personality, etc.) first, so I had something to bring to the table and ready for a relationship.

Renee

Meaghan wrote: >
> Ok, to preface my coming rant: I am a 22 year old grad student, and have
> had blood tests done for PCOS. I have a "slight" case (while on BCP,
> long story). So here is my rant. I feel so...I don't know what. I
> read posts from people who talk about boyfriends and husbands, I see my
> friends with boyfriends or getting married, and I just feel like when
> will it be my turn? I haven't had a boyfriend in 7 years, since high
> school. I think it is because I just can't see myself getting a bf,
> because of my weight, which is related to PCOS (which is why I am
> posting this here even though it is a little off topic). So what I am
> asking, I guess, is how can I learn to accept myself and realize that I
> am still pretty, even with this stuff that is going on with my body? And
> when can I expect to have a boy look at me as more than a friend? I get
> it all the time...What a great friend, you are so cool, all that stuff.
> Never you are so beautiful, please go out with me or even lets go on a
> date. Sorry about the rant, but it has been building up for a while.
> Thanks, Meaghan
>

-- Renee Cordrey, MSPT, MPH, CWS

---

Don't follow in the footsteps of the masters. Seek what they sought. --Zen saying

Next message: Chris: "My rights to my medical records?"
Previous message: Chris: "Re: PCOS and Depression"
Maybe in reply to: Meaghan: "General feelings"
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