|
Re: insensitive friend question (sort of long and involved!)
From: Susan (anonymous@obgyn.net)
Thu, 31 May 2001 13:39:46 -0500 (CDT)
I love that solution Sonnet! And I could think of a few times that could
come in handy. And don't worry about your evil side... it's one of our
favorites! lol
Susan C.
At Thu, 31 May 2001, Sonnet wrote:
>
>*giggle* Okay, maybe this is my evil side coming out, but wouldn't it be
>too good to find one of his flaws that you know shames him (and from
>what you say, I am sure you could find one!) and then next time you're
>out, have the same conversation with him except flip flopped. I.e.,
>tell him there's this freak guy you always see who has _____ (nose hair,
>a bad smell, insensitivity, a gimpy leg, whatever) and you're just so
>grossed out by having to share the world with a person like that, I mean
>can you IMAGINE! Maybe he'll pick up on the subtle point, hey? Heh.
>Don't ever let anyone make you feel like you're worth any less because
>of PCOS! You and every other woman (and every person, for that matter)
>all deserve space on the earth.
>
>At Thu, 31 May 2001, Alicia wrote:
>>
>>This is more of a personal situation semi-related to PCOS, but I am
>>looking for opinions on how to handle it.
>>
>>I have a male friend with whom I talk quite a bit. (He used to like me,
>>but I decided we were better as friends.) He does not know about PCOS
>>and I don't think he needs to know. He's just a friend after all. Well,
>>the other day we were sitting and drinking coffee at Starbucks and he
>>brings up this woman he saw with a full beard. He said he always sees
>>her when he's leaving work and she looks at him with a crazy expression.
>>He goes on and on about how there are creams and things to help with
>>that. And that, definitively, women should not have beards. He almost
>>sounded offended by her existence.
>>
>>My response was to smile and say, "Oh, really?"
>>
>>My own paranoia and experience has caused me to examine this
>>conversation in several ways.
>>
>>One, was he telling me this to try and tell ME something, as in, "I
>>notice something on your face, too. So what's up with that?" (It could
>>be spiteful, seing as I turned him down as a romantic interest last
>>year.)
>>
>>Or is he just a misinformed and insensitive man (who is far from a
>>perfect specimen himself) voicing his opinion about women (as some men
>>feel they are entitled to do)?
>>
>>And how should I have handled this? I could have launched in to a story
>>about PCOS, and how it's a common and "legitimate" reason for a woman to
>>have a beard. (But I didn't want him to start staring at my chin and
>>asking me if I have it.)
>>
>>Any opinions? I am slightly annoyed by his comments and next time he
>>says anything like that I want to be prepared. I guess I am offended
>>that HE seemed so offended by this woman's face!
>
>--
>Email always welcome to: sonnet_fitz@hotmail.com
>
|
|
![[ PCOS Discussion Forums ]](../../images/pcos_at_obgyn.gif)