To KALLIE Might not be pregnant after all - please pray
From: Angela (anonymous@obgyn.net)
Tue, 12 Sep 2000 08:45:51 -0500 (CDT)
Kallie,
I just read your story this morning, I was feeling sorry for myself
becuase I just went to the doctor's for an examine to see if there was
any follicles ( I am on the injectables, and this is my sixth day of my
cycle) and they said there was nothing there yet.
But after reading your story, I mad, I am mad that women like us have to
go through all this just to get pregnant and then something awful like
this happens. Kallie, I will pray for you , your husband, and your
baby. I also have one son, he is 11 now and been trying for a long time
to get pregnant, but the emotions are very high. Because not only do we
have trouble getting pregnant, then we are worrying throug the whole
preganany that we don't lose the baby.
I am soooo sorry that this is happensing to you, I wish I could be there
to give you hugs, but since I can't I am sending them. PLease feel free
to let your feelings out on this board and don't ever feel it is to
long. Keep us posted.
Luv and hugs.
angela
At Mon, 11 Sep 2000, Kallie wrote:
>
>This is long I'm sorry, you don't have to read it but I had to get it
>out.
>
>I have had the most devestating day. Today was my 1st ultrasound to
>determine size. Two weeks ago at the Dr. office they said I was just 5
>weeks but when the Dr. did the internal he said I may be further along
>than that. That's why he wanted the ultrasound. But he told me to wait
>2 weeks until I was 7 weeks so we would definately be able to see the
>baby if I was only 7 weeks and if I was indeed further along we'd know
>that too.
>
>So today around noon I get really excited because I realize that in just
>afew hours I was going to SEE my baby. I was overcome with the reality
>of my pregnancy and could hardly wait.
>
>I met my husband at the imaging center and I went back alone for the
>first part of the ultrasound. The technician took pictures of my
>abdomon but I thought it was weird that she didn't offer to show me the
>baby's heartbeat. When I was pregnant 3 years ago I had an ultrasound
>at 6 weeks, they took pictures of the heartbeat and everything. The
>tech said to go to the bathroom, she'd get my husband for the 2nd part.
>She explained that we'd do the internal ultrasound and then the
>radiologist would be in to explain everything. ..... Explain
>everything? I kept saying that over and over. I tried to chalk that up
>to just being the way she explained the procedures.
>
>When I came back from the bathroom the ultrasound machine was moved out
>of my view towar the end of the table. As I sat there waiting I tried
>to rationalize why it had been moved so far. Maybe to let my husband
>come around - because there was something wrong and she didn't want to
>alarm me. Only just now as I am typing this have I thought of what is
>probably the true reason. She had to stand near the end of the table to
>do the internal.
>
>Finally the tech and my husband come back. She is taking pictures and
>typing away. She still doesn't say, "see, here is the heartbeat" like I
>had expected. (( I know what you must be thinking, why didn't I ask to
>see it - ask if everything was alright. I was afraid to ask. )) She
>finished and said the radiologist would review the pics and be in.
>
>As soon as she left I told Steven that something wasn't right. She
>didn't show us the heartbeat and that wasn't right. We waited a long
>time and when the radiologist came in he said that it appears I am not
>far enough along to see much of anything yet, he'd like me to come back
>in two weeks for a follow-up. He's already called my Doc to let him
>know.
>
>He was going to leave it at that but it sounded like bullshit to me, I
>had 1 good pregnancy - Thank god my little Matt is sleeping down the
>hall.
>
>I asked him how far along he thought I was, he said about 5 weeks.
>Already off by 2 weeks (And the Dr. had been worried I was further that
>that??) When I asked him what it showed he said they could see the
>gestational sack but they couldn't see anything in it, yet. I asked him
>what else could cause that and he said misscaraige. hen he said but you
>aren't bleeding or spotting right? I said no, he said Okay then. And at
>that moment I was too crushed to speak so I couldn't say anything and he
>backed out of the doorway where he'd been standing.
>
>Thank god my husband was there because I lost it. Other than actually
>bleeding it seems that I may have somehow miscarried? You are supposed
>to see the fetal heartbeat via ulta sound at 3-6 weeks.
>
>I have to wait 2 weeks??? To know if my little baby is alive or has
>passed on??? This doesnt seem to make sense. I feel like I am so torn
>apart. How am I going to get through 2 weeks of not knowing when I am
>absoultly terrified to go back in there and have them say...I'm sorry...
>And then be suffled across the street for a D&C.
>
>I know I can't think like that but I haven't figured out how to remain
>positive yet. I am going to do alot of praying tonight for my baby and
>for strength. I'm going to call my Dr tomorrow too to see if he can
>help me understand.
>
>I soo this was really long and personal but I thought someone mught
>understand here.
>
>--
>Kallie
>
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