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could use a hug......From: anonymous@obgyn.net ("anonymous@obgyn.net")Wed, 10 Jul 2002 14:51:52 -0400
Well ladies, I've just come back from lunch. I picked up a chicken sandwich, plain and a softdrink. I took back my rental video and while in Family Video, I was perusing the selections one tall rack away from the check-out area when a woman came in asking to use the phone. She wanted to respond to something she had heard on the local radio call-in show where people call in to express opinions about things. Today's callers were most often discussing the latest additional cigarrette tax in our state, Indiana. A few also mentioned they think alcohol should be taxed higher, because it causes so many deaths thru drunk drivers. Well...this woman wanted to voice HER opinion. She said she's tired of OBESITY....SHE thinks that people who are obese should be taxed higher for junk food. (I think she also meant that everyone should be taxed higher for junk food, but she kept concentrating on OBESITY.) I tried to peer thru the shelves to catch a glimpse of her physique....as if it'd matter....but couldn't. The young kid behind the counter chimed in how he agreed with her and I didn't know whether to run and cry or jump over the shelves and whip the tar outta both of them. I've been battling a bout of depression for a while now. My best friend confessed this morning that she's been dealing with much deeper depression than she'd told me, including thoughts of suicide. I've just recently made the decision to put my schooling on hold for another five months because to go back in order to be eligible for financial aid (and there's no other way for me to pay for it) would mean starting in two weeks and I know I'm still battling severe burnout, would have to cancel my much needed "vacation" (where I go down to see my parents 13 hours away), and have been wanting to spend more time with my kids...9 and 17. I've also been struggling with the "lonelies" a bit....I live close to none of my relatives and miss them dreadfully, there are still very few people I know in my home location (most of us commute all over the place or else they've been retired for decades), and I'm trying to figure out how I feel about the guy I've been seeing a couple months. (Life is sometimes such a mess, isn't it?) Anyway.....I sure didn't need to here this biased chick's "opinion"!!!! I am sick to death of people who think being overweight is as much a choice as getting drunk!!!! I am sick of them viewing us as "lesser" saying that we have no willpower (believe me, it took LOTS of WILLPOWER to keep from following her out the door and throttling her...*wicked laughter*). I tried to be Christian about it.....even tried hard to say a prayer much like "forgive her because she knows not of what she speaks and protect her from ever having to understand what it's like because she would have to go thru it herself"....but I just couldn't really do it. And....I remembered the story I'd read years ago....a woman, who had always been heavy, was at her 25th class reunion. She was remarkably thin and everyone kept coming up to her and saying how amazing she looked now that she'd dropped the weight. As the evening wore on, she turned to her best friend who knew the true story....that this woman was thin because she'd been fighting cancer for many months and indeed, had not been given much longer to live....and with tears in her eyes she pleaded for understanding..."Why do they accept me NOW that I'm dying? Why couldn't they have loved me and accepted me for who I was when I was HEALTHY?" *sigh* Life's just not fair.......but there are some days, weeks, even years that I sometimes feel that some of us get a whole lot more of that "unfairness" thrown our way than others. I don't want to hear that I can deal with it because I'm "strong"......I don't want to be strong anymore....I want to curl up and let someone else be strong for a while. Just had to vent......thanks ladies. HUgs, Shelley -------------------------------------------------------------------- mail2web - Check your email from the web at -------------------------------------------------------------------- http://mail2web.com/ . -- --------------------------------------------------------------------
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