PCOS-MEDICATION Messages for November, 2001: Muriel, please read

Muriel, please read

From: Sonnet (anonymous@obgyn.net)
Thu, 8 Nov 2001 02:10:04 -0600 (CST)

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Just so you know up front, this has nothing (or very little in any case) to do with the ongoing discussion re: glucophage and weight loss. We totally disagree there but that's not what I'm after here!

I'm so worried to hear what you posted in your last note. It certainly makes it easier to see why the weight thing is such a big factor for you. I am blessed with a really wonderful husband and I can only imagine how awful and just devastating it must feel to be in your situation. I spent so many years of my life hating who I was because I was fat. It would be unbearable to have someone else tell me that my weight interfered with their love for me too, especially someone whose love I depend on as much as a spouse.

Please understand that I say this in real love and compassion, but his statement there is a huge red flag. If your weight makes you unattractive to him, why did he marry you earlier? He must have loved you then and it didn't cause a problem then. Is there maybe something else going on that is causing him to use your weight as a scapegoat or a weapon to hurt you? I really, sincerely hope not, and I feel for you going through this.

I have several friends that I love dearly in similar positions and it breaks my heart. I don't know anything about your personal life of course; but from that one statement I would say that no woman, no person really, deserves to be treated like that or involved in a marriage / relationship with conditions on it of that sort. Especially when they're conditions that can't be helped because of a medical illness!

Anyway, I do hope that you're not offended by my writing. I really mean it in the best way possible and hope that a great deal of happiness will come to you soon and lift that burden of having to lose weight to deserve love from your shoulders. Please forgive me if I overstepped. I'm really trying to help.

-- Sonnet

At Wed, 7 Nov 2001, Muriel wrote: > >My focus is currently on the weight loss because at the moment it appears my >marriage depends on it. My husband and I are having a VERY hard time with my >weight, and he has said numerous times that he doesn't want to make love to >me because I am unattractive to him. This, of course, makes TTC harder than >it should be, given there are no sperm to impregnante me even if I could >ovulate. He blames me for being overweight. I blame me for being overweight >sometimes too, despite all the weight I've lost, and despite the diet >changes and whatnot. I still weigh 230, twenty pounds less than when we were >married, thanks to the Glucophage and a high fiber diet. >

--
Sonnet Fitzgerald, PCOS Association, Online Community Liaison. Email: sonnet@pcosupport.org

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