PCOS-DIET Messages for July, 2001: Re: I am killing myself!!

Re: I am killing myself!!

From: Jen (anonymous@obgyn.net)
Wed, 4 Jul 2001 16:54:53 -0500 (CDT)

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At Wed, 4 Jul 2001, anonymous wrote: >
>I have always been over weight and bothered by it. I met and married a
>man who told me he would not marry me unless I lost twenty pounds before
>the wedding...<snip> The abuse was so horrible that by the time I left I
>didnt even feel alive anymore.

Did you receive counseling to recover from this abusing relationship? This man should be in jail. What he did to you was criminal, even if he never hit you. You should make sure he gets at least some criminal prosecution, if possible.

<snip>...I weighed 256 >lbs then...I now weigh 179 lbs. I have stopped eating. And when I do
>eat I make myself puke it back up. I know I am killing myself..but I
>cant stop.
<snip> It sounds like you have become anorexic/bulemic. That is a serious eating disorder that must be dealt with by a medical doctor who specializes in treating eating disorders. Please locate a physician who treats eating disorders and schedule an appointment immediately. You are so much more that either of those two little men with little egos. The fact that they couldn't accept you with your size just shows how shallow they were.

Before you get into any new relationship, please get counseling for your low self-esteem. Once a woman has been abused, she can often get so masochistic (learned helplessness) that she seeks out similar men in the future. You have to recover before you can go into a relationship so that you can approach it as a whole person, rather than someone with so much pain and loss to deal with.

Seriously, you can get better, but only if you ask for help. None of us here wants to see you die or even fall ill from your eating problems. And remember, it's your biology that you are large, not a "character flaw."

-- jen

email welcome at: jennyred.nospam@ivillage.com (note: to send me an email, take out the ".nospam" I put in my email address. That's in there for the spam-bots.)

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