Re: OB:Cesarean for anencephaly

From: Betsy Hyde (elishyde@connix.com)
Sat Oct 9 20:51:28 1999


At 11:28 AM 10/9/99, Cheri Van Hoover wrote:

>It sounds like this woman is struggling to find ways to deal with her grief.
>Wanting to hold a living baby sounds pretty classic for the "bargaining" phase
>of grief. (I can let this baby go if I only I have the chance to hold it in my
>arms while it's still alive...)

A frank discussion of the >hospital's stillbirth protocols might also be helpful. Make sure she knows she
>can have footprints, pictures, and other mementos of the baby and that she will
>have private time to hold the body for as long as she likes.

Cheri raises some good points....

Ashley (I think you were the original poster), does your hospital allow parents of babes w/ anomalies incompatible with life to hold them immediately after birth? Could this woman be afraid that with a vaginal birth, and a compromised fetus from a CV-neuro aspect, that the baby be taken away for intensive care, etc? I would *hope* that no hospital would ever, ever do this witih an anencephalic, but little surprises me these days.

I know that in situations w/ anomalies incompataible with life, it has been very important to the parents that they get the baby ASAP after birth. I don't think this is a sign of psychological maladjustment...although I agree that a referral to a grief counselor is appropriate, I absolutely do not think that the woman's feelings are in anyway pathologic.

Grief is really, really hard. We all have our own ways to say goodbye. But we can't coerce another person in doing them.

--
Betsy Hyde CNM
Branford, CT




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