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Fri: Questions to the gynecologistFrom: ainsron@msn.comTue Jun 20 11:55:44 2000
Questions most frequently asked to the gynecologist: 1. "May I leave now?" 2. "Do I have to take my bottoms off, too, Doctor?" 3. "I know that it's going to be good for me, Doctor, but is there another way we can work this ordeal so that it isn't good for you, too?" 4. "Now that I know what your hobbies are, Doctor Rush. ..What is it that you do for a living?" 5. "Where are the reins on this thing?" 6. "So, Doc," (she said as she slipped her feet into the stirrups), "What time do you reckon we'll be arrivin' in Dodge City?" 7. "Would you mind popping the speculum into the toaster for a few seconds? It's just a little chillier than I'd like it." 8. "You run a hands-on company here, don't you, Doctor Rush?" 9. "Doctor, do you really think 'Pop up on the table and say AHH' is a proper thing for a gynecologist to say to a patient?" 10. "Why are the eyes on that Mona Lisa print moving?" 11. "Are you sure your receptionist's name isn't 'Igor'?" 12. "So then, in all your wisdom and with all your years of gynecological experience, seeing thousands of patients ...are you really trying to tell me that mine isn't shaped funny? Do you mind if I get a second opinion?" 13. "Call it what you will, Doctor. ..I prefer to call it a troublemaker. It has brought me nothing but grief! I know this isn't a question but it is a fact of life."
-- Ronald E. Ainsworth, MD
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