WOMENS-HEALTH Messages for April, 1997: Re: Emotions

Re: Emotions

From: anonymous@obgyn.net
Thu, 10 Apr 1997 19:18:30 -0400 (EDT)

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Previous message: barbara: "Re: Emotions"
Maybe in reply to: Karen: "Emotions"

Hi Karen!

First of all, congratulations on your baby-to-be! What an exciting time for you and your husband! It was just a little more than a year and a half ago that I was right where you are.

Pregnancy is a time of hormonal changes that you can't possibly understand or appreciate until you experience it. The feelings you are describing are very normal. You are extremely focused on your baby right now and that's important...and o.k. (even though your boss might not agree!). It's hard NOT to think of that little baby when you carry it with you 24 hours a day! The hormones associated with pregnancy seem to bring out that maternal instinct and they increase as your pregnancy progresses, making it harder and harder some days to really stay grounded.

I know that for myself, as I got into my 7th, 8th and 9th months, it was increasingly more difficult for me to want to go to work; and once there, very hard to stay focused on the task at hand or to even care about being there. Somedays I just felt like I was going through the motions, waiting for the clock to signal the end of my day! I got the job done, but it didn't hold the interest that it once did. It sounds like you're experiencing the same types of feelings.

As for going back to work afterwards...I had planned on that from the time I found out I was pregnant, knowing (thinking) there was no possible way that we could afford to have me quit. A friend of mine went through the same thing and said that what kept her going was thinking of what that income could mean...special items, ballet lessons or a Little League team, without having to plan for the finances to cover it. Obviously, you're not working just for that, but it IS a way to get your mind on that track to make it easier to justify returning to work. In the end, for me, our daycare person backed out a few weeks before I was to return, and I was terrified of hiring someone I didn't know, so we made the decision that I would quit. It was rather frightening for me and took a lot of adjustments to get used to less than half our income, but it's been worth it. There have been days when I have doubted our decision, financially, and the stress has consumed me, but we're holding our own and making it work. This isn't to tell you what to do, just that there may be options that you haven't discovered yet.

As for the overnight trips, maybe you can get your company to let you stay home for at least the first 6 months before they send you out of town. Seems like you might be able to switch with someone...and seems like a reasonable request. And eventually, maybe your husband and baby can join you on a couple of those trips and turn them into mini-vacations!

I wish you the best of luck with the rest of your pregnancy! If you need someone to talk to about anything, please feel free to e-mail me personally (darcymj@aol.com). What you are going through is normal...so relax and enjoy these incredible months!

Darcy Johnson Co-Moderator, Womens Health Forum

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Maybe in reply to: Karen: "Emotions"

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