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Re: What to do
From: anonymous (anonymous@obgyn.net)
Tue May 29 17:40:30 2007
Don't feel like you are alone. If you look outside this particular
issue-do you and your husband have a good marriage? If you guys are
working through other issues as well a hysterectomy is definitely not a
good idea-this is why when you have a hyst-your hormones are going to
change dramatically, not to mention you (because you want children) are
going to feel a sense of loss-not only physically, but emotionally
because you'll feel like you were jipped. If you decide to do a hyst
because of your husband-you will resent (sp?) him. So if your marriage
is otherwise very strong, and he is supportive and comforting to you,
and you can set aside your need for a child (it is natural for a woman
to want children)-than maybe consider it more seriously. You need to
weigh your options heavily before making this decision. I hope this
helps-it just seems like there may be more going on in your marriage
than just the child factor-and if there is-it might be worth
re-evaluating your marriage in general. There is a difference between a
woman who can not have children because they medically can not and a
woman who can't have children because her partner doesn't want to be
burdened. You may choose to leave your husband and move on to be with
someone who does want children and find out you can't. (Not that it is
impossible, but for some women with endo-they are not fortunate enough
to have kids). I know-sorry for this being so long-I just do not want
you to feel like you are without support. If your husband won't give it
to you-you can at least find a few kind words here. Good Luck.
April
At Tue, 29 May 2007, Confused wrote:
>
>Yes I have had Laparoscopy. My husband wants me to have a
>hystorectomy...I'm only 30 years old. He said he has his future planned
>out and it doesn't involve children. He doens't even have contact with
>the children he has. I don't know...my doctor told me I shouldn't but
>then my husband told him that we have contact with his children so my
>doctor said we could do it. I don't want to, and every time we talk
>about it, it turns into a fight. He's adopted and doesn't want to help
>another child. I don't know, maybe i'm in the wrong forum talking about
>this but I have no one else to talk too.
>
>At Tue, 29 May 2007, anonymous wrote:
>>
>>Have you had a laparoscopy? If you have not, you may want to consider
>>it, I know from experience that having the endo removed can increase
>>your chances to conceive. I conceived my 2nd child after having stage 3
>>endo & having it removed. I did go through 6 months of Lupron
>>injections as well which I am not sure if that helped conceive or not,
>>but that was my experience-6 months after finishing my Lupron and
>>regulating my cycles with the birth control patch, I conceived-3 weeks
>>after ending my birth control. If you want children of your own, but
>>your husband doesn't, that is another issue that needs to be worked out
>>between the two of you, but if you both do want to have a child-it could
>>be possible (you should discuss it with your OBGYN). Good Luck with
>>everything.
>>
>>April
>>
>>At Tue, 29 May 2007, Confused wrote:
>>>
>>>This is my second marriage, I found out about 1 year ago that I had
>>>endro. I had the DNC and have been off birthcontrol for over 7 years.
>>>Still never to get pregnant. My husband today, finally told me that he
>>>did not ever want children after 2 years of marriage. I am so
>>>confused...I want children but don't know what to do. Do i leave my
>>>husband and adopt or do I live with this and end up resenting my husband
>>>down the road. He already has 2 children so when we got married, he
>>>never said he didn't want children. It was always, not right now. I
>>>need advice...I'm so confused.
>>>
>>>Thank you
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