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Need Help.......Looks like hyst time.... :-(From: PennyDoll (anonymous@obgyn.net)Thu Mar 29 07:39:07 2007
I dunno, went to the endocrinologist yesterday. Wasn't quite what I expected. Pretty much since I've done every treatment out there and never had and relief what so ever, even in pregnancy, that my adhesions are really bad and no matter what is done, i'm gonna be in pain for probably the rest of my life. So I was given 2 options. Go to pain management and see how they can help, and go to surgery later....or do surgery now and deal with pain management afterwards. I really did think there was going to be some trick up her sleeve for another option, but of course not. I guess we all hope for that one thing that works and doctors keep forgetting to tell us about. My hubby and I are fighting and he ended up flipping out on me in front of the doctor and walking out. Because at first I chose pain mngmt. and not surgery like I talked to him about numerous times. So that left me there lookin like a complete moron. On the way home I pretty much got told that I'm useless and lazy and just drug seeking and why bother goin to pain mngmt. to "seek more drugs to suck down". Wow, what great support. All because I've been to so many doctors who won't help, and don't wanna prescribe pain meds, and I've asked to go to pain mngmt in the past but I never would get help or the referral. So I guess this is how he truelly feels. And that I'm stupid to think pain mngmt will help since it's meant for "people trying to come off drugs, not for druggies like you to get bumped up higher and higher on stuff." I just can't believe it. So I got crap and yelling the whole day, while gettin blood for my neuro, setting up apts. for my MS tests, on the way to the endocrinologist, in her office and horribly on the way home. So if i'm not stressed or upset enough, this should help. And I don't have enough to cry or worry about. Now I'm alone. Not even my mother will answer the phone. She has no clue about my MS or the surgery. Today I gotta face that endoc again to talk about surgery and her methods and what not. He didnt understand that even though I've talked about a hyat many times, it's different when you're faced with it. And ya I did say pain mngmt cause I'm afraid of surgery, recovery, the pain, the time your disabled, plus bein 24 and going through such rouch hormonal changes and menopause. Plus I have a 2 1/2 month old son I take care of 24/7. And who's gonna help me after surgery? I sure won't be able to do everything for me and the baby while he sits in another room mad at me and sleeping or watching TV. I really am at my end. I think on top of all this, we gotta find some way to end this marriage...though we'll only be married 2 years this summer. I dunno, I really need some help, and advice, and a shoulder to cry on pretty much. Since this is the only place where anyone seems to care lately. And we don't even know each other! Stuff like this really shows true colors of people in your life. It's disheartening when you find out that they think your useless and horrible for trying to get help and are scared. Anyways, sorry for venting so horrible like this, but I need to get it out after yesterday. Plus how can I possibly get through all the tests for MS, then face a huge surgery like this alone? Except for my son n daughter, I feel completely useless and alone.
-- PennyDoll27@aol.com Kris
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Last Updated: Tue Dec 2 03:56:09 2008