Re: End of my rope
From: anonymous (anonymous@obgyn.net)
Wed Sep 13 21:02:07 2006
Please read this carefully, I thought I had made myself clear the first
time but apparently not, so I tried a second time and that didn't work
either - this is the final attempt, if you don't get what I'm saying
then I give up.
I am NOT saying "do not seek treatment" at whatever facility is
available to you - I am simply saying that what once was a bastian of
healthcare, safety and security (your local ER) is no longer so for
everyone.
#1 I was in no way at all insulting Sabrina's town. She was lucky in my
opinion to live in an area where turning to the ER for help in a time of
need works. If only every patient who enters an ER for help was greeted
and treated in the same way she was then there would be no need for the
cautionary statements I made.
I used to live in a town like that. There were a handful of doctor's
offices and after 6 pm the ER was the place to go if you needed a doctor
and you were greeted with compassion and your ailment was treated and
within 2 days an ER nurse called to see how you were feeling! I still
live in the same town but the doctor's are no longer accepting new
patients. You can't get an appointment with a GYN on your own, it only
comes from a referral of necessity and we've had 4 hospitals close
completely, one of them was shut down before it was even finished being
built! We have a waiting list of months for an EKG!!!
#2 It was not Sabrina, I was the one who stated what many of the women
on this board have experienced in the ER - about being misidentified as
pill-seekers, and as you pointed out surgery-seekers. It's not fair,
it's not right and when you're in a fit of unbearable pain and you go to
the ER seeking compassionate healthcare, treatment and relief it is
inhumane. It's a double insult considering how much we are already
paying for healthcare to be greeted with such harshness.
#3 Not every patient will have the same experience but with the ever
growing violence in the streets and more and more people showing up in
the ER with serious life-threateninig injuries we can no longer consider
the ER as a primary or even secondary source of treatment or relief, it
just simply is not practical anymore in most large towns and major
cities. (I originally used the word sensible as in 'judicious,
discerning, prudent, practical' and it was not intended as a commentary
or judgment of anyone's intelligence)
#4 Because of the realities as stated above it is in our own best
interests to be proactive and make sure that we are well taken care of,
well-prepared and well-stocked with whatever we need to manage our
symptoms.
And finally, I am not arguing against anyone, I just very simply stated
the obvious and you can verify the state of things by watching the
evening news. How many hospital beds has your local hospital lost? Is
there a doctor or nurse shortage in your town? How many trauma centers
are in your town? How many hospital wards, and indeed entire hospitals
in your town or towns around you been closed?
It's a sad and frightening state of affairs. I don't have any answers
other than to remind everyone that you are own best advocate, you cannot
count on others to speak up on your behalf if you are not willing to
speak up for yourself. Log your symptoms, keep detailed journals, track
your prescription medications so that you don't ever get caught short
and surround yourself with supportive friends and family.
Best of luck to you all
At Wed, 13 Sep 2006, Elisa wrote:
>
>Dear ANON~
>
>What is going on here with your posts? I can see Sabrina must have
>struck a nerve but I have re-read her posts and what she may have been
>referring too (and of course with this type of feedback who would want
>to post with such attacks here..that is just ridiculous)
>
>She was most likely stating what we all have come to experience at times
>is some of the ER's MAY flag us a wanting medicines or be misconstrued
>as a drug seeker when we ALL know that is not the case but it CAN
>happen. For you to insult her town was pathetic.
>
>In case you really want to be upset, here is one that is a reality too
>for ER's that most of us MAY not be aware of too. Did you ever hear of
>ER's calling us surgery seekers for attention? Now see that reality
>happens too and you can't insult our towns and our opinions when you
>don't agree. You can express your feedback no one is stopping you but
>coming out like that was not right. Sharing thoughts and experiences is
>what this forum is about. If ER's work for you, I think that is
>wonderful. Just like others who don't attack your statements (with the
>exception of me here because I feel you were way out of line) If you
>step back and cool off you will see where she was coming from. Again,
>she didn't say anything that we all haven't experienced one or two times
>in our walk with this disease.
>
>I hope you will be big enough to step up and apologize and keep the nice
>feeling of sharing here. Count it as a bad day. If not that is OK..but
>ladies I hope you can appreciate the intent of this statement. I have
>seen posts like this on other sites where others go through this same
>experiences daily with the ER and it's not personal it's just the cards
>we may get dealt on any particular day.
>
>I would love to find one Dr., one Hospital or facility and one city who
>can help us all but we don't have that option. All we have is each
>other. I hope everyone has a good night and keeps the sharing going
>here inspite of negative feedback.
>
>--
>Elisa
>
>At Wed, 13 Sep 2006, anonymous wrote:
>>
>>Dear Sabrina,
>>
>>Not everyone lives in a utopian-like town where everyone has the options
>>you described. Please try to keep that in mind. I have spent enough
>>time in ER waiting rooms trying to calm a hysterical kid gushing blood
>>and in obvious need of stitches but when you are kept waiting for 6
>>hours with a growing puddle of blood at your feet, you quickly learn
>>that the ER is for the injured and acutely ill - not for the chronically
>>ill.
>>
>>Most people living in larger cities have only two options A) visit your
>>doctor during office hours with an appointment or B) visit an urgent
>>care center when doc's office is too busy and save the ER for true
>>emergencies only.
>>
>>It may not seem right or fair but that is the way it is. The
>>determination of any patient being a pill-seeker is subjective to the
>>staff on duty at the time and it doesn't matter whether you have been
>>there once or ten times you catch a busy ER at the wrong time and you
>>will be treated with absolute disdain - if you doubt that is true then
>>just read some of the other posts on this forum from women who have been
>>treated abominally by ER staff.
>>
>>Absolutely go to the ER if there is nowhere else to turn - nobody should
>>suffer needlessly but if you go you should know that you may wait an
>>incredibly long time, you may be greeted with borderline animosity and
>>you may end up feeling much worse because of the added stress. Better
>>to be proactive and try to pursue better symptom management that will
>>actually serve your needs daily than to end up in the ER.
>>
>>As for my choice to post anonymously - I will continue to do so because
>>I am protecting my privacy as is my right and responsibility. This
>>website would not offer the option to do so if they didn't want you to
>>use it. Please read the rules and advisories for more information.
>>
>>At Tue, 12 Sep 2006, Sabrina wrote:
>>>
>>>I have only been to the ER twice in the last 15 months. Once in Jan and
>>>once last month. I was in SEVERE pain, doubled over and in tears. They
>>>gave me Nubain. Ideas of you will be seen as a pill seeker or frequent
>>>flyer are not always true if you go once in a blue moon. They can check
>>>your record. Because when I went in I told the dr when was the last
>>>time that I had been in. They didn't ask for that info, I offered it
>>>up. If you are in severe pain, head in. If you can wait then try and
>>>get an appt. That was what I meant. NO ONE should have to suffer and
>>>be in excruciating pain. They wouldn't have taken me straight back with
>>>a full waiting room if it was not an urgent/emergent problem. I didn't
>>>mean head to the ER all the time. Head in when you have no options
>>>which it sounded like she had at the moment. For me, it was a VERY
>>>sensible option as there are no urgent care centers, my dr was on
>>>vacation and is a solo practice, and I had no pain medicine. Plus my
>>>hospital is the only one in the county. I read as Misty needing care
>>>now and not in a month. Maybe I read it wrong. However this is what I
>>>would do in her shoes. Next time please post under your name instead of
>>>posting under anonymous.
>>>
>>>At Tue, 12 Sep 2006, anonymous wrote:
>>>>
>>>>Unfortunately, heading to the ER is not a sensible option as the ERs are
>>>>over-crowded enough and often endo patients are seen more as a nuisance
>>>>pill-seeker or 'frequent flyer' than a patient. Not right but that is
>>>>how it is. Save the ER for true emergencies and you will receive much
>>>>more compassion.
>>>>
>>>>As to the issue of having trouble getting in to see your doctor when YOU
>>>>need to - if you have the option of doing so then switch practices. If
>>>>you are not attempting to conceive you can certainly find a practice
>>>>that is primarily GYN and they will be less busy. OB/GYN offices are
>>>>usually the VERY busiest and GYN patients often wait much longer than is
>>>>truly necessary.
>>>>
>>>>If you do not want to switch or there isn't another practice nearby that
>>>>makes this option viable to you then you need to have a frank discussion
>>>>with the doctor about the attitude of the office staff and the rude
>>>>behavior. Just because your ultrasound looks normal does not mean there
>>>>is no cause for your symptoms - endo does not appear on ultrasound.
>>>>
>>>>You might also want to speak with the doctor about the availability
>>>>issue and ask for a referral to a second doctor for urgent need (versus
>>>>going to the ER for non-emergency). You might also want to ask the
>>>>doctor for a prescription of something stronger than you daily meds for
>>>>breakthrough pain or for when your pain suddenly escalates. This will
>>>>save you the feelings of desperation.
>>>>
>>>>Have you discussed a referral to a pain management specialist? That may
>>>>be your very best option for the daily maintenance and control of your
>>>>symptoms between doctor appointments.
>>>>
>>>>Good luck!!
>>>>
>>>>At Tue, 12 Sep 2006, Sabrina wrote:
>>>>>
>>>>>Hey and I am sorry you are in such pain. If you are currently in a lot
>>>>>of pain and your dr will not see you, head to the ER and get some
>>>>>relief. Your post sounds a lot like mine last month. Except that my dr
>>>>>was on vacation. I had a rude nurse too who isn't usually that way. I
>>>>>was absolutely shocked as well when it happened to me. Basically when I
>>>>>went to the ER that rattled everyone's cage. I even had the nurse tell
>>>>>me that I should cancel my appt because I didn't need it. Well totally
>>>>>different attitude when I came into the office. They were like you were
>>>>>in the ER???? I said yeah cause no one would write me a rx for the
>>>>>Darvocet because my dr was on vacation! They couldn't have been nicer.
>>>>>
>>>>>I had an awesome ER dr. She went straight to pain relief. They gave me
>>>>>nubain. My obgyn said it was pretty heavy stuff. I remember thinking,
>>>>>Well let's see I was curled up in a ball in a hospital bed in tears,
>>>>>what do you think??
>>>>>
>>>>>Anyway, you don't have to take that from the nurse. I would try and
>>>>>call again and get an earlier appt. If not, go to the ER. I don't know
>>>>>how it is in other areas or insurance, but if you have an ER visit, they
>>>>>are supposed to see you in a day or two for followup. Mine was a week
>>>>>and a half for follow up but only because my dr was out of town.
>>>>>Otherwise he would have fit me into the schedule.
>>>>>
>>>>>At Tue, 12 Sep 2006, Misty wrote:
>>>>>>
>>>>>>Hello to all,
>>>>>>I hope you all are having a great day and pain free. I called yesterday
>>>>>>to talk to the doctor and get in sooner than Nov. 6th. HA!HA! See, I
>>>>>>normally deal with the PA and at my last visit she told me to make an
>>>>>>appt. with the doctor because there as nothing else she could do. So,
>>>>>>I called crying yesterday in severe pain and her nurse called me back
>>>>>>only to get crappy with me. I have never dealt with this at this
>>>>>>doctor's office before so I was taken back at her ersponse to my tears
>>>>>>of pain. She said that she is looking at my ultrasound right now and
>>>>>>there isn't anything wrong. And I would basically have to wait my turn
>>>>>>to get into the doctor as she is busy. I was so shoked that I couldn't
>>>>>>even respond to her meaness. So, this id my problem other than someone
>>>>>>being insensitive to my pain. Should I move onto another doctor, i
>>>>>>can't even see her until Oct. 23rd, becuase she is always out. Should
>>>>>>I give this nurse one more chance and wait another month to get things
>>>>>>rolling? I am at the end of my rope with this pain. It has consumed
>>>>>>every aspect of my life and I could just crawl in a hole. I hate it
>>>>>>when my husbadn says to me that he will do something because he knows
>>>>>>that I can't. He's not being mean when he says it, it's just upsetting
>>>>>>to me that I have to live my life like this. I think that I can't sry
>>>>>>another tear yet, they keep coming. i on a daily basis fight to be
>>>>>>strong and smile. The smile is fading and so is the fight. Definately
>>>>>>unlike the person I normally am. I could just scream from the top of a
>>>>>>building for someone out there to help alll of us out. And not these
>>>>>>nasty treatments that make us all ill. Thanks for listening and I am so
>>>>>>sorry that this post is gloomy. It is not like me to be so down.
>>>>>> ~~~~~PAIN FREE DAYS TO ALL~~~~
>>>>>> Misty
>
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