ENDO Messages for August, 2006: Re: Am I going crazy?

Re: Am I going crazy?

From: anonymous@obgyn.net
Fri Aug 4 12:01:14 2006

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Hi Melinda~

No..your not going crazy. I am sorry to hear it is wreaking havoc again, however; I am not surprised. With or without cycles it can come back. It seems to be at it's worse with those having monthly cycles. I am on the Hyster side of the issue and it's back but in a whole new manner of ways and pain than those with my monthly cycles.

I have a preference of not getting laps (which is just me) because I have never had more than 6 months of pain free and bam it's back. I have learned that dissection works best for me. I actually had almost 8 years pain free with a good dissection after a hysterectomy. I didn't do HRT because it didn't agree with my system and it was a catch 22 for me. (again just me) :)

I had to tell myself a long time ago these surgeries are pretty much a maint. type of program. It does come back and there is not a cure. I hate spending money for surgeries that I am not getting the most for my money. Now, there are woman who have had better success than some due to their stages of this disease and the quality of care that they receive which makes all the difference in the world.

Ceasing cycles in some form is the first step to controlling this monster from spinning out of control. Even something as simple as consecutive B-Control pills to get it to rest until you decide to try to have children again someday. I have read so much latley from woman who had their tubes tied and they are having big bouts with this disease. Sweetie..you not using endo as an excuse...it's an invader taking control with a mind of it's own. Managing it is the best you can do. For sure see your doctor again (who hopefully specializes with this disease to minimize the rat race effect) Dating can be very hard with this disease as everyone wants to get up and go and your body and brain are not working at the same time. When I was single I just went at my own pace and had to learn to tell the truth without all the complexities until we were getting closer. At that time they have the option to try to sustain a somewhat normal relationship or have the freedom to move on. It's sad and hard I know. You need to take care of yourself first..it's not fair I know. I found my friend (husband) through a group of friends when I peeked out when I had a good day...and he has only known me as sick. I was divorced at 25 and didn't remarry (my friend ) until 35 just to make sure he could handle this. Even now with re-occurances he tries to help but he is frustrated too that this has no end. This is just the way it is.

I am sorry about your last marriage..but we believe in you and if you can give another procedure a chance (but a different one than before) maybe it will be better than last time. You have to do something soon...it will keep feeding off your body and taking you down more and more and you don't want that financially if you are single and need to maintain a roof over your head and pay your bills.

Big Hugs from Here!!!! I am here if you need me.

Elisa...P.S.. We endo sisters will date you here on the site :) We accept you the way you are :)

At Fri, 4 Aug 2006, melinda wrote: >
>I was diagnosed with endo 10 years ago. I've had two laps done to
>"clean up" and It's been three years since my last surgery. I feel I'm
>due for another one because I'm starting to have symptoms again of
>severe agitation and irritability and the pain is getting more constant
>throughout a full cycle. I'm a bit scared to have the surgery again
>because I got a post-op infection after the last one and ended up in the
>hospital for a week in severe pain. I'm afraid the infection may have
>really messed me up and caused scarring or something. I'm divorced and
>partly because of problems that arose about me not being able to
>conceive. My tubes are scarred from the endo and it doesn't seem likely
>I'll be able to have kids. I'm at peace with that believe it or not,
>but my ex wasn't at peace with it. I even find myself not getting
>involved with men anymore because I when I say I can't have kids, they
>leave skid marks. It's quite daunting, but I feel I need to be upfront
>in the beginning about that. It's only fair to them. Regardless of
>that, I'm just concerned about my mood swings and emotional outbursts
>lately. It's embarassing and most of all confusing, because it's like I
>don't have control anymore. I assume that this is a side effect of the
>endo. Or is it just me? I'm not trying to use the endo as an excuse, I
>just want to know if anyone else has these episodes. Once I get the
>lapo, it seems to subside for a while and I feel okay and pretty happy
>most of the time. I've tried everything. The pill, lupron, etc. You
>name it, nothing helps. Could anyone give me some advice?
>
>Thank you,
>Melinda

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