Re: NEED SUPPORT - GETTING READY TO BE ON LUPRON TREATMENTS
From: Alyson (anonymous@obgyn.net)
Fri Jul 28 09:55:33 2006
Lisa,
In reading your response to Inny, I would say that when all else fails
counseling is a good way to go. If he has seen the photos, listened to
the explanations from the doctor, seen you go through surgery then it
seems that it isn't so much an issue of him not understanding what is
going on with your body and perhaps an issue of his own feelings about
himself and how your disease is affecting his perception of what your
relationship should be. It may take a third party to press him on the
issue to really get anywhere. You can tell him all day long that it
isn't him, but if he is feeling that insecure about himself he won't
hear you. Having this disease not only takes a toll on you, but on the
relationships in your life. Some people handle it differently. I know
in my case it has helped me so much to speak to a counselor, and my
husband came along a couple of times too. It just helps to take the
emotion out of the way and really get down to what is going on and how
to deal with what the person is feeling.
I wish you much luck with your upcoming treatment. I hope it provides
you some of the relief you deserve!
Alyson
At Wed, 26 Jul 2006, Lisa wrote:
>
>I am just looking for someone to respond or talk to. I was told 5 years
>ago that my pain was from scar tissue from my first child(i had a
>c-section), 2 laoroscopies later, I had a doctor tell me I was making up
>the pain. When I got pregnant with my last 2 children it went away
>while I was pregnant, then just like after the surgeries it came back 3
>months later. Personally I am tired of not being able to play with my
>kids, laying on the couch in pain all the time, being tired, fatigued,
>and taking pain meds. Next month I am starting the Lupron treatment &
>was wondering if anyone has taken that & how it helped or not helped. I
>am tired of my husband forcing the issue on sex, when he knows it is
>painfull, or better yet telling me that I am using my medical issues as
>an excuse not to make love to him, or him telling me I am making it out
>to be worse than it really is. Is there any online support groups for
>husbands? Maybe if he heard from other men, he would seem to understand
>more. Cause me telling him every day what I am going through is getting
>old. It is like he asks me everyday what is wrong & everyday it is the
>same answer, but it seems to be that he is not even trying to understand
>or even listen when I tell him. Please HELP!!! How do I cope with this.
>It is hard being 25 with 3 kids & dealing with the endo & my husband.
>These past 6 months or so, I have even thought of us splitting up, cause
>I just can't take the forcing of having sex, or even waking up with him
>on top of me. I was raped as a teenager, & I have tried to explain to
>him not only is it painful due to what I am going through, but also when
>you are sleeping, & you wake up with someone one top of you, it makes
>you first think that someone is raping you again. You would never think
>that the person you married & love so much & that is supposed to love
>you back would do something like that. He does this at least 3 maybe 4
>times a week & personally I get more & more discusted with him each
>time, to where I don't even want to show any affection to him, even if
>it is not sexual. I NEED HELP - ANY SUGGESTIONS ON HOW TO HANDLE THIS?
>
>--
>Lisa - Painfull in Kansas City
>
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