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Re: To Loretta & OthersFrom: Loretta (anonymous@obgyn.net)Thu Mar 30 02:35:40 2006
At Wed, 29 Mar 2006, JoCee27 wrote: > >I think that we find ourselves becoming more in tune with our bodies now >that we know something is wrong versus our ability to ignore it and go >on if we don't know anything is wrong. We are very strong people--all >women are--that we so often can make ourselves push onward and go the >extra mile putting off any aches or pains that we might suffer at the >expense of how others feel about us and their opinions. > >We'll stand over the stove and cook dinner for our family when we're >running a fever of 102. We'll walk a basket of clothes out to the >clothes line when we feel like we've been run over by a semi. We'll get >up and glide a vacuum cleaner across the floor when we feel like we'd >rather crawl under the covers and die. We'll call out of work and take >a sick day just to find ourselves cleaning all the things around the >house we normally don't have time to clean during the week because of >our job, errands, or other responsibilities. We'll not complain, gripe, >or pitch a fit when asked to do just one last thing or one more thing. >Not only that, but no matter what is wrong with us, both genders will >walk into our home and if it less than tidy, we are considered weak, >irresponsible, neglegent, slobby, and selfish. > >A mother no matter how bad she feels should get up and do for her family >and care for all of their needs; so society says. A wife should still >have dinner on the table by 5 and wait at the front door with hubby's >paper and slippers. Having the flu, a cold, endo, or any other disease >seems to be socially unacceptable as a reason for a woman to be lacking >in her duties to her family and her home. > >A woman also feels the pressures of society's opinion of her that we >worry what people think when they see a sink full of dishes that we've >not felt good enough to wash. We wonder what they think when they see a >pile of laundry overflowing onto the floor and trickling down the >hallway. We take offense to anyone who says, "What happened in here? >Did a bomb blow up?" We feel like we are verbally stumbling over >ourselves when we try to explain that we've been having an endo flare up >and that's why our house is out of whack as if people don't believe us; >like we just naturally live like pigs. > >If we ask those in our lives to give us one moment to relax, take a >break, and take care of ourselves it's like asking for mercy from a >merciless court. So in all of our duties, of all the things we push so >hard to make ourselves do, we do feel the aches, pains, stresses, and >tensions that our bodies scream at us and it's because our bodies are >signaling that we need to stop, sit down, and take a rest. It's not >just that we know how this disease affects us because of some textbook >definition we read or self-diagnosis checklist we filled out, but how we >work so hard to fight against it everyday just to live our lives that we >notice what it does to us even in the smallest of ways. We know how it >feels when it rears its ugly head every month. We can almost pin-point >down to the hour that our endo symptoms will start. If that's not being >in tune with one's body due to society's strict opinion and expectations >of a woman, I don't know what is. > >JoCee > >-- >ENDOANGEL JOCEE > >Endometriosis Online Support Group >http://com3.runboard.com/bendometriosissupportgroup > >Endo Sisterhood Support Group >http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/EndoSisterhood/ >
-- Thank you JoCee You said pretty much what I have been feeling over the last few days. After spending 3 partial nights in ER, and an additional 4 hours in 2 days in a noisy clinic with a snappy nurse,a full morning back at the hospital for yet more Xrays, blood work and check overs, 3 shots of pain killer that I am not used to so sucks the life from me. An average of 3-4 hours sleep in these last few nights.Today my house lookes like an earthquake hit so its time to clean a path,make travel arrangements for a trip that nessisary and for anything but fun,dogs that have been inside for 3 days so needed to run, my daughter who is so busy and desperatly needed me to run her to her appointments that she has had to put off as I have been unwell, the bills to be paid, cheque to deposit,and grocery's to be picked up.All the things I have had to let go the past 3 days and if I was to put anything off any longer I would be so far behind it would be worse to leave them. Bless my daughters heart for doing what she could after school and before work and after her homework before bed.AS the garbage needed to be done,laundry folded and litter box cleaned. Things I just couldn't do today before I fell on the couch in agony. Tonight my cramps and inflammation are such as I can't sleep till the little pills kick in but too at times tend to keep me awake. The only thing I have energy enough to do is sit my little butt in my soft chair and read how everyone's day was and take my mind off myself for a bit to see what if anything I can say to someone else to help their day. If I sound like I am whining trust me, I am not.I am used to this,but sometimes I am sad that it is like this and with my husband working out of town for weeks/months at a time driving myself to clinics/Er/hospital lab, the things at home and my guilt at my mothering at the moment it all gets a litle much. I know I am by far not the only one, I do not feel better in knowing there are others who go thru this very thing, It makes me sadder, it does however give me stregnth knowing if they can do it so can I. I wish and pray for all of you in pain, healing. Loretta
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