ENDO Messages for March, 2006: Re: TMI, embarassing pain during sex question

Re: TMI, embarassing pain during sex question

From: Angie (anonymous@obgyn.net)
Sun Mar 19 12:30:23 2006

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Sabrina,

You are going to have to come up with a lot worse than painful sex to embarrass this group. LOL. A lot of women here suffer with the same symptoms. I have the exact symtoms you have with exception to the spotting. Sex is so painful to me I haven't had sex in 6 months now. Fiance is lucky if we have sex 2 times a month and when I do have sex with him I take a couple of pain pills about an hour before. The pain meds don't help with my intense abdominal pain, might as well use them for something it helps.

A while ago I posted about not even wanting to have sex and feeling bad for my other half. Women told me some different positions to try ect. Nothing helps. The only way I am pain free in the sex department is not having any. Which does not sit well with fiance.

I used to be embarrassed talking about certain subjects with people, especially when talking about my Endo problems. I just blurt it out now. Hey, if they feel uncomfortable getting the answers don't ask. When taking to men about my problems (the ones who ask), instead of saying intercourse hurts I get down on their level..."it hurts to be boinked and that's why he's not getting any"....the more vulgar you get with guys the better. It doesn't embarrass them as much. With women on the other hand, gotta be more gentle. Which is the way I prefer to discuss things.

So you gotta figure out why you feel uncomfortable about talking of certain things. Is it becasue you are afraid you will offend them or does it offend you? If it's about how you think you make the other person feel, be blunt with men and sugarcoat for women. That works best for me. If it's about the way you feel, that's something you have to work on. No advice there because only you know what's going on inside your head.

The point being of course....yes, painful sex is very normal for a lot of us.

Have a nice day and hopefully you get some of that "drive" back. Experiement and find ways that might be more comfortable for you. Try the spoon position because men love it and we don't get the blunt of his manhood so the thrusting isn't that bad. Good luck!!!

At Sun, 19 Mar 2006, Sabrina wrote: >
>I am very modest so it is hard for me toask this in an online forum much
>less that witch of a nurse that I have had to talk with lately at my
>ob's office. I could talk about it with my obgyn, but sorry not his
>nurse. Way too uncomfortable with her. I don't even like discussing my
>issues with her period.
>
>Anyway, thought I would ask here first. Pain during sex. Ok first I
>havn't done it very much since Sara. The Zoloft my ob had me on killed
>that drive completely. Then I went off of Zoloft in February completely
>cold turkey and wallah the drive came back. But the few times that dh
>and I have done it, it has been painful. At first I thought it was
>getting back in the saddle type of thing. But it's different now. Of
>course I didn't have symptoms of endo till after Sara was born in June.
>The lower right side hurts during sex. It also hurts from the "blush"
>thrusting part. Bad pain. It just was not fun and I was really happy
>when we were done. Then I had pain throughout the night afterward on
>the lower right pelvic and lower right back. This morning spotting that
>has since gone away. This can't be normal and I can not just call up
>the nurse line at my ob's office and ask this question. NO WAY NO HOW.
>My obgyn has not asked about this type of symptom and I have not told
>him about it.
>
>At my 5 week pp appt, he asked if I was sexually active to which I
>responded to him he was absolutely crazy to even think that right now
>considering I had just had a baby, uterine infection, and a D&C. I told
>him it would be very long time till that happended for my dh again if
>ever. My ob kind of smiled about that and said ummmmm ok, alrighty. So
>that's how I know I can talk about stuff like that with him, but NO WAY
>to a third party like his nurse.

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