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Re: If it's not one thing it's another....ventingFrom: Jennifer (anonymous@obgyn.net)Wed Apr 28 11:49:34 2004
I can totally identify with your pain about one thing after antoher. I am 23 married two years and I am having a lap on the 14th. They do not know if I will be able to have children. I also have a solid mass the size of a baseball on my left ovary along with suspected endo. I have spoken with a few women who can not conceive naturally and have found some support from their words. Something someone said to me was "everything is the way it should be, no matter what" whatever you beleive in, something bigger than you is a work here. Maybe there is a baby out there that really needs you and your husband. Or maybe you two will conceive, maybe the time is not right yet. When bad things happen we never seem to understand why. I have come to find it is not our job to know why, I could drive myself nuts (well more nuts than I am already :-). What is our job is to deal and try to do the best we can and be the best we can. One thing it sounds like we have in common is a great support system from our partners. That is one thing to be very greatful for and you two will find strength in eachother, no matter what the outcome is. I wish you luck...Jennifer in New York > >So sorry for all pain. You are in my thoughts and prayers. My sister >and her husband had the same problem. She had endo and then after that >was fixed they found out that he had no sperm count. He was able to >have an operation to fix that (a vain was being cut off by a kidney >obstruction or something like that) and now they have two beautiful >children! There is always hope. >Amanda > >At Wed, 28 Apr 2004, Danielle wrote: >> >>Last month I had my first lap done. Doc diagnosed me with stage 3 endo >>and polycystic ovaries (not the syndrome). My fiance and I have been >>trying for a baby for nearly 4 years with no results. When Doc >>diagnosed me we assumed we were well on our way to conception. At my >>one month post op Doc said now would be the perfect time to start trying >>(boy was I happy) because I am all nice and clean inside. Before I >>leave he says he'll need to do a sperm count on my fiance just to rule >>everything else out. I take the cup home, he does his thing, and take >>it to the lab at the hospital. Feeling real good at this point....I >>call Doc and he says he'll call me back with the results that afternoon. >>They call and tell us that after all the hell of Endo, PSO, and trying >>to conceive my fiance has a sperm count of 0. Not one single sperm >>showed up in the test, not one. I was histerical and he is so upset. We >>call his mom who is a nurse, who works at a hospital and she gets on the >>ball calling the urologist(sp). Doc said he might be making sperm but >>they just can't get out and whatever is causing this is probably >>genetics. We go to my mom's to talk to her (she's not his biggest fan) >>and she tells me that maybe it's a sign I should find someone else, a >>private donor to do it the "old fashioned way", or not have kids. Great >>support from my mom. I am just so upset and shocked about it all. I >>don't know what to say to him other than I love you and we'll be >>alright. He's not taking it well and says he feels like less of a man, >>not good enough, etc etc. He has stood by me through my lap, mood >>swings, lack of labido, endo pain, doctors visits, etc etc. WHY US? Why >>not someone who doesn't want kids...I wish my mom would look past her >>dislike for him (it's been four years) and see how much the situation is >>hurting both of us. I am sorry this is so long but you gals have been >>here for every other question and vent I've had and I appreciate it. >>Danielle >>"If what doesn't kill us only makes us stronger, by now I should be >>Superwoman".
-- Jennifer in New York
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