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Re: A question about endo treatment for all of the Moms out there
From: Kira (anonymous@obgyn.net)
Thu Oct 17 12:45:37 2002
Although I'm not a mother, and I'm only 18, I think you're doing the
right thing. If treatments havn't worked out in the past for you, it's
not likely they're going to work out now. It might be good to go get an
ultrasound to make sure there arn't any large lumps or cysts developing,
but short of that the only other treatment is sounds like you have left
would be a hysterectomy, and who wants that in their mid 20's? You might
be able to compromise with her though. If you go to the doctor, have an
ultrasound, and discuss with your doctor what you can do on your own,
diet and excerise wise, maybe she would be satisfied. Just tell her
that's all you're willing to do before you go. Just an idea. Good
luck!
Kira
At Thu, 17 Oct 2002, anonymous wrote:
>
>Hi. I have a question for all of the mothers out there, especially if
>you have a daughter with endometriosis. Let me say right away that I am
>the daughter, and I'm asking a question about a disagreement I'm having
>with my mother, whom I adore. The short question is: why can't mothers
>let their daughters make their own decisions about medical issues? A
>really long message follows -- I'm sorry about the length.
>
>Here goes. I was diagnosed with endometriosis since high school. I'm
>in my mid twenties now. Throughout college I went through various forms
>of treatment, including Danocrine, Lupron, and two surgeries. Three
>years ago, the symptoms starting returning, plus I developed a strange
>ache in my left side. In the last year I've had two episodes of
>irregular bleeding (6 months apart), plus I've started spotting at the
>end of my periods since July. Periods are pretty difficult, I must
>admit.
>
>Clearly, weird things are happening. My specialist is wonderful, but I
>haven't seen him in 4 1/2 years because I decided after college not to
>seek further treatment for various reasons. I feel that I can deal with
>this on my own, basically. Haven't let myself miss a day of work for
>periods or any other problems. Plus, I'm still a virgin, so there's no
>risk of complications associated with sex.
>
>I'm not happy with the way past treatments have gone -- they didn't cure
>the problem, and the hormones gave me terrible side effects. Plus, I'm
>up for promotion at work and am afraid that I might lose it if I took
>off time for surgery. My side is that I should be able to make my own
>decisions about not seeking further treatment, and those decisions
>should be respected, especially in light of the work/promotion
>situation.
>
>My mother feels completely differently. She won't leave me alone about
>this, keeps saying that I'm upsetting her, and practically begs me to
>see the doctor. I adore Mom and understand that she's worried, but I
>also feel suffocated -- I'm an adult, why can't she let me do what I
>want or avoid what I don't want? Why can't she be like my father? He's a
>physician, he thinks that I should see the doctor, but he told me it was
>my decision, and that was the first and last thing he ever said about
>it. However, Mom keeps bringing it up. She won't even listen when I
>give her medical facts about how rare complications from untreated
>endometriomas or endometriosis are. (Maybe I should note that she would
>never have found out about these problems except that I, in my
>stupidity, accidentally let it all slip one day when I was blowing off
>steam.)
>
>Someone told me that mothers get upset when they feel that their child's
>well-being is threatened by something. Is this what's going on here?
>I'm trying to understand her side. I don't want to just assume that
>she's trying to control my every move, because even though it feels that
>way, I'm sure it's not really that way.
>
>What should I do? We all want to make our own decisions without being
>pressured, but I'm at a loss. I don't want to cause my mother worry,
>but I don't want to feel pressured into getting treatment. Help!
>
>Thanks very much!
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